Thursday, March 31, 2005

In Memory ...

We lost one the brightest minds in law on Tuesday, March 29th. Johnie Cochran passed from a bout with a brain tumor and it was almost treated as an aside.

The signoff on my local newscast had the anchorman coming back from a story about an 83 year old lady who does what she can at the local firehouse trying to relieve tensions and give the boys what they may be missing at home and he then goes, "Oh yeah and Johnie Cochran is dead. Good Night and Stay Classy."

Cochran was a man that started out prosecuting in what was at the time the largest prosecuting attorneys office in the world, the L.A. District attorneys office, and quickly made his way to one of their lead roles. At that point they created a monster that would come back and bite them in the ARSE.

Fulfilling the internal need to serve a greater good, he started defending the rights of disadvantaged people. Having won 10 straight criminal defense cases against his old employer, he took the case of Geronimo Pratt. L.A. DA's office was not going to let him get passed them with this one. Right or wrong, Cochran was not going to win that case. So Pratt's innocence was of no consequence. Johnie was defending so innocent or not, the case had to be one of example. Cochran lost his first case, Pratt went to jail for life, and it has been discovered that tons of evidence that would have freed Pratt had been buried by the DA.

Johnie never the less was pole vaulted to a level of celebrity. But regardless of his station he still remained grounded, taking cases upon merit rather than dollars. As he defended 'The Glove' to the best of his ability, he also defended Reginald 'I got the Beatdown' Denny. He wowed the jury at the OJ trial when he spit, "If the Glove don't fit, you must acquit ..." As OJ faked as if the blood stained glove was too small for his hand.

The Cochran victories are the stuff legends are made of while the defeats were hardly noticed. So with his passing, we don't look at it as a defeat, but a home-going. Godspeed Johnie. We only regret that R. Kelly, Beanie Seigel, and Kobe Bryant could not retain you.

Sunday, March 06, 2005

Madness of Chuck E. Cheese Has Harsh Influence on Adults .....

Mad Woman Caught on Chuck E. Cheese Camera

Dateline --- Round Rock, TX Posted by Hello

A woman who reportedly is the mother of two was unknowingly captured on a camera at Chuck E. Cheese shooting the bird to a minor who was apparently barging in on the good times had by the children in her charge. To this reporters knowledge, nothing this shocking has ever been posted to this blog. The children that were under the watchful eyeful of a young lady rumored to be.... well, we will call her CP (to be known henceforth as Mrs. X), display utter shock, horror, and disdain for what is going on. The young man, circled in the bottom right of the inset, whom we can not name because he is a minor (we will call him Chase) is oblivious to the intruder as well his mothers 50% off peace sign that she is flashing at the young intruder yet to be identified.

"Mrs. X has always seemed so responsible and mindful." said the five year old along for this magical ride.

"I knew something looked odd about the hand gesture being used" quoted another parent nearby.

We called Mrs. Xs' home and our call was answered by someone claiming to be Mr. X. He babbled a few incoherent words followed by a Guiness Black and Tan induced burp. As we tried to get more information from him, he gave us a resounding F U and hung up the phone.

It has been speculated that the use of this term is commonplace in the X household. Cursing more than a coven of witches on Halloween, the Xs' are not the most high level communicators and resort to belittling others under duress.

So when in Pattersonville understand that you don't to back either of them into a corner. The 'F-Bombs' fly early and often. God forbid you are in the need of asistance, on any roadside as this family comes riding by. As you wave to try and get their attention, they will be waving back. And their wave will not be indicating that they are number one, nor will they be point you to the right direction. As they pass, it will become abundantly clear what that signal is. Turn it up, turn it down, it sound the same whistling in the wind.

or at least half of it anyway.