Monday, June 20, 2005

Bit by Bit ...

Damn, I though of that first ....

There a millions of things that I wish i could do, but have not had the opportunity. Things that generally would exprees my displeasure (some say all I have is displeasure, but I digress.

Tom Cruise was stumping for his next big budget piece of crap that he is about to drop on the viewing public, when four dudes posing as a foreign TV crew, rolled up with trick mic in hand. The renegade reporters got Cruises attention during a walk down the red carpet on the way to a screening of 'War of the Worlds'. Personally, I have had bowel movements that I anticipated more than this -- ahem -- crap. The reporter in this fake crew held the mic to Tom's face and squirted water or something that appeared to be water. A livid Cruise called the guy a jerk and referred to the prank as nasty.

I have always wanted to squirt Cruise for something to let him know that Minority Report, M.I.P 2, Vanilla Sky, Magnolia, Interview with a Vampire, and on and on were unadulterated crap.

Leo DiCaprio was partying with Paris Hilton's ex-videomate (those racoon eyes were hilarious) when a angry female broke through to crack Leo with a beer bottle. No ambulance was called out during the 4am incident, but Leo had to get 12 stitches. Maybe he will start chosing better roles now.

Leo is under the impression that he is the bast thing in Hollywood, if River Phoenix had not been taken, Leo would be on the Long Beach exit ramp with a Will Act for Food sign.