Thursday, December 11, 2008

F-Bomb : The Day After

INT.  DAYTIME  AROUND 10a - OFFICE of the GOVERNOR ROD BLAGOJEVICH

The office appears as though a whirlwind has just hit it.  Gov. Blagojevichs' (I always have to slow down when I type that name) secretary is busy answering several ringing phone lines while sitting on the remainder of her desk chair).  She is asking some callers to hold, removing her ear from the phone when other callers chose to yell into the receiver, and some line she just refuses to answer.

The secretary is almost amazed as she spy the governor and his posse striding through the hole where the door once was.

GOVERNOR BLAGOJEVICH
(passing the secretary)
Hey, Peggy.
(stopping at the splintered door of his office)
Can you hop down to Starbuck's and get 
me a triple mocha half whip tucked under 
and nut rolled machiatto?  It's my b-day, 
yanno ...
(turning to the boys in his posse)
You boys want anything?

It's gonna cost you!!!!!
(The governor breaks into a blast of knee slapping laughter)

I crack me up ... But seriously, what happens the next day, your birthday, the day after you have been arrested for what you had revealed by way of wiretap, no less than two days after you stood with unionized employees that simply wanted their rights and stated that people caould tape anything he says.  As if he was as Teflon as John Gotti.  One week after Plaxico Burress was perp-walked in New York, Blagojevich took the same walk of shame.  At least they let Plax come down to the station, they got dude at his crib ... in front of his neighbors (usually a look that would be reserved for Plax and the crew).

This type of stuff would be only plausible in a David Chase story like 'The Wire' or 'The Soprano's, it is certainly a great combination of the two.  If the guy felt/knew he was being taped, why was he doing so much talking over the phone?  Tony Soprano, Avon Barksdale, or Marlo Stansfield would all have come up with alternative communication than phones ... and they are criminals.  If you are the governor, you would think he would have some inside track to information that was being gathered on you ... unless you have no friends.

All and all, I have created the most unusual excuses for mot showing up at work (some justified ... most were not), but I think having been arrested at my home, taken downtown and booked, and trying to find someone to answer the collect phone call to come bail me out would have sufficed.